Declarative Language: What, How & Why?
In the field of child development and education, the way adults communicate with children can significantly impact their behavior, understanding, and emotional well-being. Among the various communication strategies, declarative language has gained attention for its effectiveness in fostering positive interactions and promoting independence. Unlike questions or demands, declarative language provides children with information and encourages them to think, reflect, and respond autonomously.
WHAT?
Declarative language involves making statements or observations that provide information rather than directly soliciting a response or instructing a child to do something. It is a way of sharing one’s thoughts, feelings, or observations without putting pressure on the child to respond in a specific manner. For example, instead of saying, "Can you pick up your toys?" (a question) or "Pick up your toys now!" (a demand), an adult might use declarative language: "I see toys on the floor." This statement simply observes the situation, allowing the child to process the information and decide how to respond.
HOW?
To illustrate how declarative language can be more effective than questions or demands, here are a few examples. You’ll find in each scenario, the declarative statement provides information and leaves room for the child to interpret and respond, fostering a sense of control and independence.
Situation: A child is not sharing toys with a sibling.
Question: "Why aren't you sharing your toys?”
Demand: Share your toys with your sibling!
Declarative Language: "I see that you have a lot of toys. I wonder if there's a way to play together."
Situation: A child is very upset and crying
Question: "What's wrong? Why are you upset
Demand: "Stop crying right now!"
Declarative Language: "I see that you're upset. I'm here when you're ready to talk.“
Situation: A child is not coming to the dinner table.
Question: "Are you coming to the table?"
Demand: "Come to the table now!"
Declarative Language: "Dinner is ready, we are all sitting at the table."
Why?
1 - Encourages Autonomy and Critical Thinking
Declarative language fosters a sense of autonomy in children. When adults use statements instead of questions or commands, children are invited to think critically about the situation and come up with their solutions. Research shows that promoting autonomy supports intrinsic motivation and enhances children's problem-solving skills (Ryan & Deci, 2020). For instance, saying, "I notice that the table is set for three people," gives a child the opportunity to realize on their own that another place setting is needed, rather than being directly told to "set the table for four people."
2 - Reduces Pressure and Anxiety
Questions and demands can create pressure and anxiety, especially for children with developmental differences such as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) or Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Studies have shown that children with ASD, in particular, may feel overwhelmed by direct questions or demands, leading to anxiety or avoidance behaviors (Prizant et al., 2015). Declarative language, on the other hand, provides a low-pressure way for children to engage with information, which can reduce anxiety and increase engagement. For example, instead of asking, "Why aren’t you sitting down?" an adult might say, "It looks like we are all sitting now," which conveys the same information without the implied demand for an immediate response.
3 - Promotes Language Development and Social Communication Skills
Declarative language also promotes language development and social communication skills. When adults model declarative language, they provide children with rich language input that includes various vocabulary, sentence structures, and ways of expressing thoughts and feelings. This exposure helps children learn how to use language for different purposes, including commenting, sharing information, and expressing emotions (Vygotsky, 1978). Moreover, declarative statements can be open-ended, allowing children to contribute to the conversation in their way, which is essential for developing social communication skills.
4 - Builds Emotional Intelligence and Empathy
Using declarative language helps children understand others' perspectives, which is a critical component of emotional intelligence and empathy. For example, saying, "I feel happy when you share your toys," helps a child understand the emotional impact of their actions on others, fostering empathy. Research suggests that children who are exposed to more declarative language are better able to understand and respond to the emotions of others, which is vital for social relationships (Gottman & Declaire, 2021).
